The second question is "How did you come to that conclusion?" or something similar, which not only helps you understand why the person holds this position, but keeps the burden of proof on them if they have made some kind of truth claim.
The third question is a leading question. This is a question you would ask when you already know where you want to go in the conversation. Instead of forcing the point by making a statement, you can lead or draw them to the point you want to make by asking a question that allows them to make your point for you.
Now, I am not a strong conversationalist and it remains a challenge for me to slow down and use Columbo instead of rushing in and making my point outright. But, the following is an actual conversation I had with a friend a few days ago, and though I am not a deft Columbo tactician, it is an example of questions 1 & 3 employed with some success.
At church we've been looking at how we can help people take their next steps towards Jesus. So I had been looking for a way to start a conversation with someone at work in order to do that when I vaguely remembered a discussion I had with one of the guys about a year ago.
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Me: Hey man, when we were on that trail run didn't you say that you had grown up in the Catholic church?
V: Yes.
Me: Do you still make it to mass?
V: No, not really. I still go on holidays, but other than that I don't go. It just isn't a priority for me right now. You'd think it would be since I have such bad medical problems. But I don't know. I've just been focused on other things. I still believe in the sacraments, though, and always will. I'll always be Catholic, but you know, I find a lot of other ideas very interesting.
Me: What do you mean?
V: Well, I think about the after-life a lot. I think it's a fascinating topic. You know, the Eastern religions have this idea that each of us has a dark side that we have to overcome and that the after-life is really about overcoming that darkness. I can see that. I think we all have our demons. But who knows. I don't know. I don't think anyone can know for sure what's waiting for us.
Me: What if you could know for sure? What if you didn't just have to guess?
V: That would be great, but how?
Me: Well, both the gospel of John and John's first epistle say that you can know for sure. You see, the Bible actually agrees with what you just said, in a way. It says that each of us really is full of darkness that needs to be overcome. It says we're actually dead in that darkness and unless we can overcome it we'll remain in that darkness forever. The bad news is that none of us can actually do that. We just don't have the ability to overcome it on our own. That's the bad news. The good news is that God overcame that darkness through Jesus' life, death, and resurrection, and that if we trust Him with our lives and that He did that for us, then He takes us out of that darkness. And John says that when we trust Him like that, He gives us that assurance so that we can know for sure.
V: Yeah. I wonder what it's like, though.
Me: What do you mean?
V: Well it's not like someone can go over to the after-life and then come back and tell us what it's like. I mean there are so many different ideas about what it's like on the other side. They're all so intriguing. I'd like to hear about all of them, but since we can't really know for sure I wouldn't take any of them as gospel.
Me: [LOL]
V: What? What's so funny?
Me: Well, it's funny that you put it that way. "I wouldn't take any of them as gospel." What if there was someone who actually had gone over to the other side and came back? Would you put more credibility in what he had to say than in others who hadn't been there?
V: Well, yeah!
Me: Ok. It just so happens that in those gospels you mentioned there was one who died, went to the other side, and then came back. Not only that, but He was the Son of God and He had quite a bit to say about what the after-life is like.
V: Oh yeah!
Me: So, since Jesus was divine, and had died, crossed over to the other side, and came back, would you agree that we could trust what He says about the after-life?
V: Yeah, I guess so.
Me: And since it's the gospels that tell us what He says about the after-life, then you actually CAN take it as gospel!
V: Oh Yeah! I guess so! [LOL]
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* You can learn more about the Columbo Tactic on Stand To Reason's website, but if you really want to digest it, I recommend listening to Greg's weekly podcast, and buying his book Tactics - A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions.
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